Congratulations, you’re engaged!!! That’s a huge deal. You don’t get engaged every day! (And if you do, well, you have a problem that is far beyond our grasp. Please seek help.) But now that your significant other has popped the question/you’ve popped it to them/you accidentally popped it to each other at the exact same time in a comical double-proposal, you may be wondering what to do next. Wait, do I get the marriage license at the DMV? Do I have to call my old middle school principal and ask for permission? Do I have to make a wedding hat?! Fear no longer, sweet child. We know exactly what you need to do first.
Pick Your Maid of Honor – Maids of honor are a huge help in the wedding planning process. Organizing people, picking color schemes, buying or renting decorations, etc. No one can do it alone, so choose your maid of honor early and make a game plan with him/her. Be strategic in choosing your maid of honor. Let’s say one of your best friends is a rigorous planner who is always punctual and makes organized to-do lists. But your other best friend is six hours late to everything and has a habit of losing her car for days at a time because she can’t remember where she parked. One of these will be a reliable maid of honor. The other one will make a great bridesmaid, provided she remembers to come to the wedding!
Be strategic in choosing your maid of honor. Let’s say one of your best friends is a rigorous planner who is always punctual and makes organized to-do lists. But your other best friend is six hours late to everything and has a habit of losing her car for days at a time because she can’t remember where she parked. One of these will be a reliable maid of honor. The other one will make a great bridesmaid, provided she remembers to come to the wedding!
Work on Your Budget – How much are you going to spend overall? On what in particular? What are ways you can save money? (Be on the lookout for vendor discounts.) Dream big: Start with your ideal wedding, see if it’s plausible within your constraints and then compromise. Maybe you’re the extravagant type who wants a full performance by America’s top clog-shoe dancing group or an appearance from the Harlem Globetrotters. Or maybe you’re more low key, and you want to get married in a library in front of just six people. It all costs money somehow, so bust out those Texas Instruments and get to computing!
Attend a Bridal Show – Bridal shows will help you get a quick idea of the vendors in your area and general price ranges for each. (Remember what we said about those discounts.) Go do some recon with your betrothed and your maid of honor. See the photographers, videographers, DJs, etc., who look awesome. See who looks skeezy. If there’s a DJ who’s just a guy with his phone and an aux cord, you might want to keep looking. (Or hire him! Maybe you respect his audacity. The point is- examine your options.)
Book a Venue – You gotta find a place to host your wedding. You can’t get married Nowhere! Science hasn’t advanced that far yet. A church, a barn, a rock club, a Walgreens parking lot, a hospital cafeteria, an abandoned haunted amusement park; somewhere! Reserve with the venue as soon as you can, because they can fill up fast. (Except maybe the haunted amusement park.)
Booking a venue first also makes it easier to pick a wedding date. Before you book, you have limitless hypothetical wedding dates. This can be overwhelming. But then if a venue tells you, for example, “we only have open days in July and August,” then that makes the choice easier.
Nail Down That Date! – Once you see your options for wedding dates, pick one as soon as possible. Make sure the most important people in your life will be able to make it, but don’t worry about every single potential guest. If Ted from work has tennis practice that day, he can shift his schedule around to make it to the wedding, or not. And that’s okay. Ted needs to work on his serve anyway.
The important thing is having a date locked in so you can start booking with vendors. And booking far in advance gives everyone, both vendors and guests, plenty of time to make your special day their priority!
These are just the first steps to planning your wedding! With a solid base such as this, you’re well on your way to having a perfect ceremony! Perhaps even more perfect than when Joanie married Chachi on Happy Days. May many happy days await you and your spouse!